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THE COWBOY’S LAMENT

This comes comes from Autumn Leaves:

His horse had a back like a cast iron grate,

along with a slew-footed, bone-jarring gait.

This greatly agitated the beans he had ate.

 

As he continued passing gas,

He knew he had to act fast

Before Mother Nature held sway.

 

Just up ahead was a cluster of trees

Where he could dismount and bend at the knees,

Letting Ole Mother Nature have her way.

 

Quickly leaping to the ground,

He glanced all around

And dropped his overalls down over his toes.

 

With instant, easing relief,

Which put an end to his grief,

Slim shouted, “Thar she blows!”

 

While shouting, he waved his arm,

Causing his horse to alarm.

It took off with a jack rabbit start.

 

With a stricken look of aghast

At his horse leaving fast,

All he could do was pass gas.

 

Now early this morning,

He’d left just at dawning

To begin this catastrophic caper.

 

Slim was overwrought

With a sickening thought…

He had forgotten to bring along paper!

 

Grabbing a handful of grass,

He made a quick pass

And began to pull his overalls up.

 

His pants got caught on his spurs,

And he started to fall,

Sprawled out like a three-legged pup.

 

Slim had been put to the test.

As the sun sunk in the West,

He turned his horse out to pasture to rest.

 

“Cookie,” said Slim with a wink,

“These troublesome events have a link

Which caused me to ponder and think.”

 

Slim hooked his thumbs in his overall jeans,

Grinned at the cook with a mischievous look,

And said, “I want to compliment you on your wonderful beans!”

 

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